This time it didn't work.

Infertility treatment is accompanied by a wide range of emotions, both positive ones related to hope and expectation, as well as less pleasant ones such as anger, sadness or disappointment after a failed treatment cycle. The greater the hope and determination, the more difficult it is to come to terms with the idea that it didn't work out this time. What can you do to recover from this situation?

You have a right to be angry

Each new attempt to try for a child gives rise to new hope. There is faith and expectation that it will finally work out. However, when the desired pregnancy does not come, anger and disappointment arise. Such feelings are natural and are experienced by many women and couples in treatment. Expressing these emotions is a way of experiencing difficult moments. It is worth giving yourself the right to do so!

The vicious circle of stress

We often try to drown out or suppress all bad emotions. Unfortunately, this only gives a temporary sense of relief, because repressed and unspoken feelings often return with double the force. They often turn into long-term stress, which negatively affects the physiology. Cortisol, adrenaline and noradrenaline are secreted, which put a huge strain on the body and can reduce the chances of getting pregnant. And so the circle closes...This is why it is so important to externalise all bad emotions. 

Guilt

Why did I fail? This is a very common question asked in such situations. Many people treat the failure to get pregnant as a fault. They blame themselves or their partner. However, an unsuccessful treatment cycle is associated with many different factors, sometimes difficult to recognise. It is not worth getting discouraged after the first unsuccessful attempts. It is better to gather strength and energy for further efforts.

Invaluable support

Talking to your partner about your feelings, about what you need from the other person at that moment, helps you get through the more difficult moments. A lack of this, especially at times of accumulating bad emotions: guilt, sadness and disappointment can lead to a relationship crisis. This is why it is essential to have support. It is important not to focus your thoughts solely on healing after a failed attempt. A weekend away or treating yourself to small pleasures are what will help to prepare you mentally for the next attempt.

A great idea is to talk to a psychologist. It's not an insult, but a great opportunity to get to know each other better and confront all the emotions that are crushing us.

It is important to remember that an open attitude and acknowledging the right to experience disappointment will make it easier to go through the treatment process and increase the chance of success at the next attempt.